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You're named Miami's AD. What 3 changes do you make?

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1. I call Urban Meyer and offer him EITHER the Head Coaching job or the AD position, whichever he prefers at this stage. Full dominion over the program and he can name his salary.
2. Beg him to take the job
3. When he initially says no , raise more money and keep begging. Procuring prostitutes is not out of the question.

I'll add a bonus 4th step......Perpetually continue step #2 above until he officially takes another job. Then, and only then, move on to the next target. I'd gauge Butch's interest as AN ATHLETIC DIRECTOR only.
 
1. Hire my own mercenaries to drag our every employee for every sport inside the Hecht out into Greentree. Coaches, janitors, receptionists-- every employee must be bound and forced at gunpoint to walk in a line where they'll be hung at the gallows in groups of 3.

2. Transport the bodies to Marlins Park and bury them under the pitcher's mound as an offering of contrition to the Orange Bowl gods.

3. After we've eradicated the stench of losers and mediocrity from the building, I tell the BOT that anyone with any suggestions for the athletic programs can forward them directly to my inbox, where I then flip up my blazer and bend over and gesture frantically to my exposed *******.

4. I schedule a power lunch with Urban Meyer and offer him the chance to name his salary as our head coach and operate with complete and utter freedom.

5. I send out my goons to hunt down Golden, Shalala, Dorito, Coker, and Shannon and have them carve upside down U's into their foreheads to forever mark them for their role in destroying our empire.

6. Employ roughly 20 of the highest quality chongas from south Florida and deploy them to Alabama, Clemson, and the other programs that our research finds are most responsible for poaching South Florida talent. Help them become employed in those athletic departments and task them with the goal of recording sexual misconduct by anyone important.

7. Make Carol Soffer my wife.

8. Fire Joe Zagaki and Don Bailey Jr from a cannon into the ocean.
 
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I forgot a 5th step. Tie up and blindfold every single employee in the Athletic Department and drag them out to the practice field. Charge $5 admission and open up the event to all fans. You're allowed to throw anything you want that won't cause permanent damage.

There's your initial funding for Urban. I alone would make the line about 927 times.
 
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1) I fire Manny Diaz.
I like Manny as a man, I think he wants to win... but I never thought he should have got the job to begin with. He cant go from, "this is not a rebuild" to "this is a rebuild." As the AD I'm gonna drop my balls on the BoT meetings and go after them about their laziness, and drag them through the press about hiring Manny in the first place.
2) I go after Mike Gundy and top notch assistants. Offense needs to look like...
HC: Mike Gundy
OC: Chad Morris or Larry Fedora
OL: Alex Mirabal
WR: Trooper Taylor
RB: Jujuan Seider
3) I try to rebuild the relationship with fans to get them to sell out Hard Rock every home game.
 
ssj4cane said:
1-Tell the college football world to kiss my ***.

2-Hire Art Briles

3-Profit
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I have suggested Briles as OC on this board before. He's one of the best to ever do it in CFB. He's coaching at a HIGH SCHOOL and would take the job for practically nothing.

If I were AD, it'd be done yesterday. I'd reach out to Gundy for HC. If we couldn't raise the funds, I'd reach out to Norvell.
 
JeddTheFisch said:
I have suggested Briles as OC on this board before. He's one of the best to ever do it in CFB. He's coaching at a HIGH SCHOOL and would take the job for practically nothing.

If I were AD, it'd be done yesterday. I'd reach out to Gundy for HC. If we couldn't raise the funds, I'd reach out to Norvell.
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Honestly, Briles is so radioactive that it's simply not worth the risk. It'd be like hiring JoePa as head coach after the Sandusky ordeal.

He's a great offensive mind no doubt, but you can come relatively close to replicating his offensive system without signing up for all the baggage he brings. There are simply other guys out there that can probably get us 90% of the offense he runs with 0% of the headache, and for my money it's not worth it for that extra 10%.
 
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I hire SEC football first guys with track records to savage coaching hires. I then make a pitch to the admin and BOT saying we will make alot of money on the brand if you let me pay whatever I have to to claim what's rightfully ours. I hire Urban Meyer tell him he has unlimited resources and bring us back from death.

I walk out my introductory press conference hiding my **** in my hands and saying.....we back.
 
Katzenboyer said:
Honestly, Briles is so radioactive that it's simply not worth the risk. It'd be like hiring JoePa as head coach after the Sandusky ordeal.

He's a great offensive mind no doubt, but you can come relatively close to replicating his offensive system without signing up for all the baggage he brings. There are simply other guys out there that can probably get us 90% of the offense he runs with 0% of the headache, and for my money it's not worth it for that extra 10%.
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U see what u said about Briles? That's exactly why we are where we are...that puzzy type thinking and scared of what people have done. This is why we suck we hire scared we coach scared the media is scared the admin is scared....everyone's scared. A bunch of fairy's are running us into the ground
 
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Dwinstitles said:
U see what u said about Briles? That's exactly why we are where we are...that puzzy type thinking and scared of what people have done. This is why we suck we hire scared we coach scared the media is scared the admin is scared....everyone's scared. A bunch of fairy's are running us into the ground
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No it’s not. Art Briles not being here is not why we stink currently.

Someone else can do what he did at Baylor. Hiring him is not a necessary condition to playing well and if you think that, you know nothing about football.
 
Katzenboyer said:
No it’s not. Art Briles not being here is not why we stink currently.

Someone else can do what he did at Baylor. Hiring him is not a necessary condition to playing well and if you think that, you know nothing about football.
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Briles would be a slam dunk period.....I would take him Freeze ....Butch.....guys that know how to hire staffs know the importance of recruiting and are basically CEOs that are dependable and know what it takes to play competitive football


We are to soft and wouldn't hire someone with balls...because we are TNM not the old Miami we all miss and love
 
Dwinstitles said:
Briles would be a slam dunk period.....I would take him Freeze ....Butch.....guys that know how to hire staffs know the importance of recruiting and are basically CEOs that are dependable and know what it takes to play competitive football


We are to soft and wouldn't hire someone with balls...because we are TNM not the old Miami we all miss and love
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Agreed about too soft and lack balls. We don’t need Briles or Freeze to fix that.
 
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Hire Butch Davis conditional upon him getting Moffitt, our S&C guy, back from LSU AND GIVE HIM $1,000,000 or $1.5 mill if necessary, to get it done. We need menfolk. I'll leave staff up to him: his own coaching tree is loaded with NFL types. His own contract would be heavy, very heavy with incentives for conference title and much bigger for NC. Special bonus for undefeated season including playoffs and penalties for every loss -- little protection against the famous sideline brain farts.
 
Katzenboyer said:
Included the "you're the AD" to avoid responses about firing Blake/Strawley. Here's mine:

1. Hire a HC who has been a HC at at a G5 or P5 school. It's too steep of a learning curve for a first-timer to come in and be the administrative head of a program. Bring in someone who has done it before (Clawson, Campbell, Fleck, etc.)

2. Spend the money Enos is making on a major DC. It's much easier to manufacture offense in the college game, and you can do it for cheaper than it costs a stud DC. Give the big money to the defensive side of the ball and hire an OC at a small school to implement things on the offensive side of the ball (look at Kevin Johns, David Yost or Warren Ruggerio if you hire Clawson for the offensive side; all will come in for less than the $1M+ being handed to Enos).

3. Double the recruiting budget. It's believed to be less than $1 million per year, which puts us in the 20-30 range of expenditures per year. We have the ability to get within the Top 10 easily, and the fact that we don't is just sad.

What would you do? Let's try and be realistic (i.e., "drop bags" doesn't really help us much since we don't do it).
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Remove any reference anywhere on campus to Blake James and Strawley. Tear out their offices and turn them into janitors closets.

Then go find the money to triple the Clemson or Baga AD's salary and bring them to Coral Gables to replace me, because I'm not qualified to be the AD for UM.
 
Gatorhater said:
Hire Butch Davis conditional upon him getting Moffitt, our S&C guy, back from LSU AND GIVE HIM $1,000,000 or $1.5 mill if necessary, to get it done. We need menfolk. I'll leave staff up to him: his own coaching tree is loaded with NFL types. His own contract would be heavy, very heavy with incentives for conference title and much bigger for NC. Special bonus for undefeated season including playoffs and penalties for every loss -- little protection against the famous sideline brain farts.
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This makes too much sense so TNM won't do it
 
Katzenboyer said:
Included the "you're the AD" to avoid responses about firing Blake/Strawley. Here's mine:

1. Hire a HC who has been a HC at at a G5 or P5 school. It's too steep of a learning curve for a first-timer to come in and be the administrative head of a program. Bring in someone who has done it before (Clawson, Campbell, Fleck, etc.)

2. Spend the money Enos is making on a major DC. It's much easier to manufacture offense in the college game, and you can do it for cheaper than it costs a stud DC. Give the big money to the defensive side of the ball and hire an OC at a small school to implement things on the offensive side of the ball (look at Kevin Johns, David Yost or Warren Ruggerio if you hire Clawson for the offensive side; all will come in for less than the $1M+ being handed to Enos).

3. Double the recruiting budget. It's believed to be less than $1 million per year, which puts us in the 20-30 range of expenditures per year. We have the ability to get within the Top 10 easily, and the fact that we don't is just sad.

What would you do? Let's try and be realistic (i.e., "drop bags" doesn't really help us much since we don't do it).
Click to expand...
Before taking the job? I’d have my coaching candidates Play a 10 year dynasty mode on ncaa 14 with UAB. Learn how to get it done. If they do they make my short list.

then have them try to duplicate it in a 10 year madden 20 franchise mode.

then hire accordingly
 
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