Thoughts From the Bench Press: Syracuse

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Just my luck! The game I cant attend and we putting a 50 🍔 on Fran Brown

Marc Lamont Hill Wtf GIF by Identity
 
The Bench Press has become more entertaining than the game. Thanks for giving us something to look forward to!
Thank you!!

There’s for sure a few demented booger devouring pussies lurking around here but mostly just legit fans looking for ways to enjoy the last two decades of beating our heads against a wall
 
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On a serious note, this Cuse team is horrible. This needs to be 60 minutes of the Stanford second half. 52-10 and 10 might be generous.
 
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That’s right Canes bros and broettes it’s that time of the week again and also that time of the year again

Walking into the gym following another critical disaster of a game in the ACC that ruins our season and trying to get hype for the next one…

So grab a spotter, pour out an extra bump, grab a bigger syringe and strap in…we are gonna need it

It’s still BENCH DAYYYYY no matter what mother****ers

View attachment 342171

I admit last week I said “**** this” after we once again took a big fat **** down our legs when we needed to hold it together most

Another outclassed ACC opponent with a bunch of Miami castoffs that we could beat on paper with our eyes closed

All we really had to do was not beat ourselves

Whelp

View attachment 342172

I was pretty ****ed but then a sobering thought hit me:

Much like when you see people here sober up and have their Zoloft kick in I realized

This is all in the handbook we were given

Why am I acting surprised?

Here’s the handbook for all of you still holding out hope for a playoff birth

View attachment 342173

Before the season I picked 9-3 as the record. I couldn’t justify 3 losses other than “this is what Mario does”

I said last year “If Mario can’t win with this team he can’t win here”. Well he won a little bit but here we are again

I never liked the hire because he clearly has always lacked a certain quality that leads a team to the promised land

It’s hard to put into words exactly what that is but ultimately it’s just “he’s not capable”

View attachment 342174

This loss hit a little bit harder because it’s been 4 years of “PATIENCE” only to get to the same exact spot we’ve been

We were more successful under Richt, a guy that literally had to put up his own money for resources

We finished the 2021 season on a tear under a dead man walking coach and these mother****ers had the audacity to tell us Mario was coming in to a complete “REBUILD”

Rebuild

View attachment 342175

View attachment 342176

So here we are, the season technically on life support while our tuff and disciplined coach fields a team (and offensive line) that plays with a staggering lack of discipline and toughness

So since we can’t count on Mario to give us something to be hype about…

View attachment 342177

THIS is why we delay the inevitable for one more week anyway:


Malachi Toney: He should get Heisman votes. Seriously. He must feel like Jon Snow at the Battle of the ******** every week

View attachment 342178

Meanwhile his QB is Bran Stark. Piddle ******* around in a wheelchair doing a whole bunch of nothing but getting all the glory (the money). Beck the Broken what an amazing story amirite.

Keionte Scott: One of the biggest positives this season for me. He isn’t perfect but plays with a ridiculous motor and finds the ball like a magnet. Like Christy Canyon they just stand out amongst the rest. Real shame that the toughest offense we face every week is our own. He must walk by Mario/Dawson/Beck every week thinking:

View attachment 342179

Bain: add the guy to the list of incredible Hurricanes talents ultimately wasted by inept head coaching. He will go on to make huge NFL money as he deserves but a guy like this deserved to play for more in college. Between being suffocated by holding calls and an offense that can’t give them even the slightest bit of help he must feel like the dad putting in 80 hours a week on the construction site while mom sits around waiting to **** up his day when he gets home. Give him the big piece of chicken at least

View attachment 342181

Verdict:

Syracuse. A joke of a program led by a joke of a coach.

View attachment 342182

I commend people for thinking we will change

The problem is Mario doesn’t think there’s a problem other than doing what we are doing, only better

We know what’s coming

We are gonna win this one. We are gonna win against NCST. We are winning @ VT. We are losing @ Pitt just when we need to win most…again

So for now let’s enjoy the wins

Some days you hit the gym feeling good and some days you go because you know you gotta go and grind no matter the excuses

View attachment 342184


Good Guys 9
Bad Guys 3

View attachment 342185
This post is an elusive, intelligent, well thought out objection…OVERRULED!



We conquer the Cuse and avenge last years lost. We’ve lost to NCSTU roughly like 1-3 times since joining the mighty ACC in 2004, the most recent one being on the road. Find me the last time they beat us in the state of FL. After a quick Google search, they’ve never beaten us at The Rock. Virginia Tech? Same kinda thing. Haven’t dropped a game to the Hokes in almost 6 years. As for Pittsburgh? Ha! They’ll be ranked and we know Mario likes to beat up on teams with a little # next to their names on the bottom of our TV screens. 10-2. We’re in. It’s happening. I’m a full believer.
 
Last edited:
I hear you. The wife tells me, just turn the tv off if you hate them so much. I can’t. I just can’t quit em.
She’s very wise. I have a bit of the opposite problem. My wife knows sports pretty well but she’s still a bit newer as a fan so when I get ****ed she’s like “maybe they just need to throw it downfield” and she doesn’t know the levels of Mario’s dysfunction
 
I totally agree. I do honestly expect a pretty thorough beat down

I just had to vent some humor because dammit man being a Miami fan ain’t easy
With Bama losing to FSU and how Miami started the year I was having so much god**** fun watching all my boys meltdown while riding high. I should’ve known I’d get like a month of that, tops.

I hate myself every day for not just rooting for the school that paid me to get a degree.
 
My original prediction was 4-3 but I think we get a few key turnovers on defense
That’s pretty much a blowout, scoring 15% more than our opponent. Sunday morning fluffer squad will be in full force and “The Faction” will again be labels haters.
 
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With Bama losing to FSU and how Miami started the year I was having so much god**** fun watching all my boys meltdown while riding high. I should’ve known I’d get like a month of that, tops.

I hate myself every day for not just rooting for the school that paid me to get a degree.
Yeah I mean like I was saying earlier there’s a few people here I wouldn’t cry if they got run over

But for the most part anyone here still willing to talk about this team every day, good or bad, I respect the loyalty anyway even if it’s sick 🤣
 
View attachment 342169

That’s right Canes bros and broettes it’s that time of the week again and also that time of the year again

Walking into the gym following another critical disaster of a game in the ACC that ruins our season and trying to get hype for the next one…

So grab a spotter, pour out an extra bump, grab a bigger syringe and strap in…we are gonna need it

It’s still BENCH DAYYYYY no matter what mother****ers

View attachment 342171

I admit last week I said “**** this” after we once again took a big fat **** down our legs when we needed to hold it together most

Another outclassed ACC opponent with a bunch of Miami castoffs that we could beat on paper with our eyes closed

All we really had to do was not beat ourselves

Whelp

View attachment 342172

I was pretty ****ed but then a sobering thought hit me:

Much like when you see people here sober up and have their Zoloft kick in I realized

This is all in the handbook we were given

Why am I acting surprised?

Here’s the handbook for all of you still holding out hope for a playoff birth

View attachment 342173

Before the season I picked 9-3 as the record. I couldn’t justify 3 losses other than “this is what Mario does”

I said last year “If Mario can’t win with this team he can’t win here”. Well he won a little bit but here we are again

I never liked the hire because he clearly has always lacked a certain quality that leads a team to the promised land

It’s hard to put into words exactly what that is but ultimately it’s just “he’s not capable”

View attachment 342174

This loss hit a little bit harder because it’s been 4 years of “PATIENCE” only to get to the same exact spot we’ve been

We were more successful under Richt, a guy that literally had to put up his own money for resources

We finished the 2021 season on a tear under a dead man walking coach and these mother****ers had the audacity to tell us Mario was coming in to a complete “REBUILD”

Rebuild

View attachment 342175

View attachment 342176

So here we are, the season technically on life support while our tuff and disciplined coach fields a team (and offensive line) that plays with a staggering lack of discipline and toughness

So since we can’t count on Mario to give us something to be hype about…

View attachment 342177

THIS is why we delay the inevitable for one more week anyway:


Malachi Toney: He should get Heisman votes. Seriously. He must feel like Jon Snow at the Battle of the ******** every week

View attachment 342178

Meanwhile his QB is Bran Stark. Piddle ******* around in a wheelchair doing a whole bunch of nothing but getting all the glory (the money). Beck the Broken what an amazing story amirite.

Keionte Scott: One of the biggest positives this season for me. He isn’t perfect but plays with a ridiculous motor and finds the ball like a magnet. Like Christy Canyon they just stand out amongst the rest. Real shame that the toughest offense we face every week is our own. He must walk by Mario/Dawson/Beck every week thinking:

View attachment 342179

Bain: add the guy to the list of incredible Hurricanes talents ultimately wasted by inept head coaching. He will go on to make huge NFL money as he deserves but a guy like this deserved to play for more in college. Between being suffocated by holding calls and an offense that can’t give them even the slightest bit of help he must feel like the dad putting in 80 hours a week on the construction site while mom sits around waiting to **** up his day when he gets home. Give him the big piece of chicken at least

View attachment 342181

Verdict:

Syracuse. A joke of a program led by a joke of a coach.

View attachment 342182

I commend people for thinking we will change

The problem is Mario doesn’t think there’s a problem other than doing what we are doing, only better

We know what’s coming

We are gonna win this one. We are gonna win against NCST. We are winning @ VT. We are losing @ Pitt just when we need to win most…again

So for now let’s enjoy the wins

Some days you hit the gym feeling good and some days you go because you know you gotta go and grind no matter the excuses

View attachment 342184


Good Guys 9
Bad Guys 3

View attachment 342185

Good lord. I feel the pain. I also feel like this is me getting psyched for the bench after last week:

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