UMFarArcher
All-ACC
- Joined
- Nov 4, 2011
- Messages
- 18,584
I awake and turn to CIS and flip through other sites to find out if Golden maybe was fired,
resigned,
swallowed up by a sinkhole on a recruiting trip outside Ocala,
drove off a country bridge in New Jersey,
was hit by an exploding meteor,
took another job as tackling dummy at Southern Cleveland Middle School Prep,
choked on a chicken bone, extra spicy,
got neck broken when his tie got caught in some rotating equipment that throws footballs,
a tree limb broke and crushed him while choking down a triple meat, triple cheese from Wendy's,
a toilet backfired, the methane exploded from faulty wiring, and launched Golden nine blocks away before he crashed into a highway and was run over several times, and then backed over several times by Miami Hurricane fans after they realized who it was,
fell twelve stories while taking a selfie while planking,
gets stuck and chokes in a chimney playing a really, really fat Santa Claus,
vapor locks after being sent a dummy obituary where he was described as "drooling, alone, and very unpopular,"
whizzed on an electric fence late at night at the side of a country road, tumbled down into the ditch, and was snake bit. Snake died of injuries during the course of being crushed, but the venom was apparently directed right into the neck, right above the orange tie.
And every day, I'm really disappointed.
resigned,
swallowed up by a sinkhole on a recruiting trip outside Ocala,
drove off a country bridge in New Jersey,
was hit by an exploding meteor,
took another job as tackling dummy at Southern Cleveland Middle School Prep,
choked on a chicken bone, extra spicy,
got neck broken when his tie got caught in some rotating equipment that throws footballs,
a tree limb broke and crushed him while choking down a triple meat, triple cheese from Wendy's,
a toilet backfired, the methane exploded from faulty wiring, and launched Golden nine blocks away before he crashed into a highway and was run over several times, and then backed over several times by Miami Hurricane fans after they realized who it was,
fell twelve stories while taking a selfie while planking,
gets stuck and chokes in a chimney playing a really, really fat Santa Claus,
vapor locks after being sent a dummy obituary where he was described as "drooling, alone, and very unpopular,"
whizzed on an electric fence late at night at the side of a country road, tumbled down into the ditch, and was snake bit. Snake died of injuries during the course of being crushed, but the venom was apparently directed right into the neck, right above the orange tie.
And every day, I'm really disappointed.
